Discussing about the rules of engagement

Never realized the day would come for me to have a set of rules of engagement in the course of my marriage. I always see it as a form of legalism which marriage and love should be able to conquer.

Nonetheless, imperfect as we are, selfish as our hearts would be, we have no choice but to discuss and came to this conclusion; In order to allow and help each other to be better communicators and partners, we need to have some set of rules to allow for vulnerability..

And so we set some of ours:
1) when one talk to share our feelings, just listen and don't try to defend.
2) when we want to speak, we ask if it's ok for us to speak.

Lessons in Marriage: the truth

"whatever I say to my wife, must be true. But whatever is true, I need not tell my wife!"

My good friend told me this saying. 5-years of marriage has taught him this about communication. It's a game called life. In an ideal world, the truth sets us free. Its meant to liberate and not being down the trust we have in each other, let alone the way we look at one another.

My only guess, insecurity exists in this imperfect world because we have to live in it. Our desire to improve and win, creates a bi-product in losing and the not-good-enough standard.

No wonder there is no perfect formula to our behavior! In all that we do, there will be-for sure, someone whom we will offend.

Such-is life!